Find Me before I am Gone.

I think I know.
That you've taken the path of no return.
There wouldn't be any turning backs.
Not for an instance even.
I think I know.
that i am not even a memory now.

The doors would remain unlocked.
and the pathways, dimly lit.
no, not the bright light. Only shades of white.
Or possibly off-white. Grey.
May be you could could hear it. If you listen enough.
Words, no. Cries of a dead poet.

An unopened can of beer, half baked cake.
Follow the scents from your memory,
of the sweat that you wiped of my chest.
That night, it had rained heavily.
And yet, we were warm.
Find me now, before i cage myself in.

Gifts

She walked away gifting him her hopes and dreams in exchange of his pains.. Had he put half the efforts as she did, they would still have been together

Echo

and finally,

you let me plunge deeper into you,
as if you wanted me to listen.
to the silence that had engulfed you.
I could hear your cries of despair,
and then you asked me to look deeper,
even more deeper, into your heart.
and i did look.
I could see; hope, dreams and love.
By the, I gained the courage,
to look straight into your eyes.
And gosh ! a burning fire pot.

Your silence was profound.
it had stories untold,
and poems unheard.

Worlds do Change !

Tonight would be longer than usual.

The stars may not brighten up the sky.

Yet, it'd be livid.
The twinkling of your eyes.

The burning desire for love, lust and passion.

As your entwined selves come to halt at the bed,

His hands tantalizing your bare back.

As he scrolls through your untied hair

and blows chills into your ear,

and deep kisses on your nape.

You'd lose yourself onto him.

As you two become one,

somewhere down the street,

a lark would sing the song and weep.
Of despair, agony and pain. 

A song of guilt, regret and anger.

You'd clutch his back, make him bleed and yearn for more.

And I, I'd hold on to dear life

and search for purpose.

I have become nothing more than

an ever fading memory.

One where the dust settles.

സമാന്തര രേഖകള്‍

ഇനി നടന്നകലാം.സമാന്തര രേഖകളായി.
ബന്ധനങ്ങളില്ലാതെ.

ഹൃദയഭേദകങ്ങളായ വാക്കുകൾ കൈമാറാതെ,
കുറ്റപ്പെടുത്തലുകളും കുത്തുവാക്കുകളുമില്ലാതെ.

വിധിയെന്ന് നിനക്കും വിധിച്ചിട്ടില്ലെന്ന്
എനിക്കും സമാധാനിക്കാം

ഇനി നടക്കാം. പതിയെ. അകലേക്ക്.
ഒരു തുള്ളി കണ്ണീർ വീഴ്ത്താതെ.

Let's walk away slowly, on to parallel worlds. No ill wills and no blame games. You'd console yourself as fate while I'd argue against it. Let's walk. To the farthest end.

Hope

Some people when they leave are like kites that have lost the twig connecting it to the ground. They'd be gone with the wind regardless of what you wish.

 

I harbour hopes of you
returning one day to me
only to realize moments later
that you aren't a ship set on sail.

Wishes

He had woven dreams,about a life with her before she faded into darkness beyond the horizon.

Good Byes

Have you ever had to say a goodbye that you knew would break you down, alter you as a person, yet you had the courage to do it, knowing it's what's best for you?

Or, would you rather give it all your heart and never say that good bye and build a new world around you?
The choice rests in you. You ability to decide. And to forgive. 

How would it feel to you,
if all the goodbyes you've heard so far,
said to you, 'all-at-once'?
does that terrify you ?

This is exactly how i felt,
when you said about breaking away
to a new world of our owns and
never again, OURSELVES.

Known Strangers

To write one must endure pain, break his heart. Yell at the top of their voice and talk to the wind and the void, stare at the emptiness within themselves . For that gives them expressions and words . 

To fall out of love, is not so uncommon. From the entwined souls to those who couldn't start each other, to familiar strangers and then finally to two individuals.

But why can't there be a different choice? To fall out of love, yet remain in love. With all the time you have had. With the memories. Why can't there be harmony between the past and the present?  

 



















To lie down awake in a state of denial
Not willing to accept the reality
To be alive yet to feel like dead.

I somewhere know that it must be
The same for you. All the hurt and pain.
But you are just way too stronger.

Things could have been different.
The unbecoming of us, to known strangers
I could have set it right before it was time

There is no more whirlwind and butterflies
There is no long road and starry nights
The colors have faded to the shades of gray.

It's true when they say.
That you can either fall in, or out
It kills. But do I have another choice.

How I wish if bridges can be rebuilt.
But where do you attach the strings that hold.
It'd hang as a memory of days bygone.

A chance is all it'd take.
To set things right.
And it's that we don't have.

I could wait all my life.
For undoing the wrongs that's been
For you to embrace me,Once again.

Grief, hurt and guilt.
That engulfs me.
A drop of tear that rolls out.

Things could have been different.
Only if I took those minutes I spend
On nothingness for better.

May be a time will come
When what's broken is fixed
I lay in a bed. In white.

You'd walk down the road.
It'd rain. Like the clouds weep.
A minute of silence.

I'd be watching over.
From up above.
I'd yearn to hold your hand, even then.

The silver lines in your hair
The wrinkles in your face
You might have aged. Gracefully.

You'd close your eyes for once.
A droplet kissing your Cheeks.
I'd know that I am forgiven.

Burning Out

That feeling of being alive in the vicinity of of the one who you cared so much and be painfully invisible to their eyes. When ignorance would tear you apart.

You'd wish upon me, as if
I were a shooting star
For your new found love, my love,
as I Burn out in your Atmosphere*

* Burning out in the atmosphere - a line from a JohnMayer song.

മടക്കം

ആഗ്രഹങ്ങൾ ബാക്കിയില്ല.
ഇനി മടക്കം. നിന്നില്ലൂടെ.
ആർത്തിയുണ്ട്. ജീവിതത്തോട്.
നിന്റെ മടിയിൽ തല ചായ്ക്കുവാൻ.
നിന്റെ മൗനത്തിലലിയാൻ.
കണ്ണീരുകൊണ്ട് മാപ്പപേക്ഷിക്കുവാൻ.
ഒരു പുതപ്പിന്നടിൽനിന്നെ ചേർത്തു പിടിച്ച്
മഴയുടെ താളങ്ങൾ കേൾക്കാൻ, പിന്നെ
രാത്രിയുടെ നിശബ്ദത അറിയുവാൻ.
പിന്നീടൊടുക്കം നിന്റെ മിഴികളിൽ നോക്കി
ഒരു വാക്കു മിണ്ടാതെ വിട പറയുവാൻ.
നിന്റെ കരങ്ങളിൽ എന്റെ അധരങ്ങളമർത്തി
മൃത്യുവിനെ പുൽകുവാൻ.


[There are hardly any wishes left, It's time to return, to you.
The only lust now is for life,
to lie down in your lap,
to get lost in your sound silence ,
to beg for your apology with tears,
to be with you under one blanket,
to listen to the tunes of the rain
and the nothingness of the night,
in the end, to bid farewell,
looking deep into to your eyes and no words uttered.
To welcome death, kissing your hands a last time]

You

For years
I have only looked at you from far
Not knowing
If I should speak to you or not
I would silently sneak at your picture
And then I see a warm smile on your face
I'd imagine myself being next to you
Looking at you
Without you noticing even
And then you'd go on, Your ways
And I'll wander around, in search of you
And later
When it rains
I see you
Walk by my side
An umbrella in your hand
And then you cover me up as I walk ahead
And then we dance
As the rain cools down
You throw the umbrella away
And then
You and I
Together
Walking
Hand in hand
The moon silently following us
To the Beach
And we sit down there
Counting waves
Painting the sky of your imagination
With dreams of our future
Wondering why the waves come back to the coast
Even as it rejects the waves
Where I promise you
To be the wave
To come for you
Everytime you are down
And when you are up
Never to leave you alone
To be the wave
To wash away your worries
And bring you pearls of happiness

Apology

It wasn't like the usual days.

Her heartwarming smile, vanished

Tears rolled down her cheeks

It was the first time they argued.

He had lost his calm,

Words of fury, unleashed upon her

And her words ended in empty ears

She hardly knew why.

It was night again.

And all his anger subdued.

He took her in his hands,

Whispered in her ears, words of love.

Her eyes still wet, yet a spark in her eyes

The stars bespangled their bed.

In the sound silence of the hour,

She embraced him, and his apology.

December Rain

 It wasn't this difficult earlier.
To sit down and let words weave a story.
To get lost in that dream.
To wander in the island of thoughts.

And the it was all gone.
Like how the rainbow did.
The one they saw last time together.
In a moment and no where to be seen again.

And then he walked on, purposeless
Through the plains and the valleys.
The streams were dry, and birds didn't sing.
It wasn't summer even.

He lived through the autumn and spring
Yet the flowers did not blossom.
The words too vanished from his head
Leaving him in a world of chaos

And then it was winter again,
He had returned home by then
Oaks and Pines and Carol songs.
And not a light in his eyes.

And then did she come,
Like rain to the deserted land.
And filled his life with hopes.
Her laughter, that insites passion.

He yearned to be with her.
For her to lie down on him
To look look into her deep eyes,
And see the world in it.

To live in her eyes, and her,
In his arms. Forever. And ever.
She was the paper, and he the ink
Together they were a soothing poetry.