Hopefully I Live...

I am just trying to write another poem, where i am not the speaker and she is.

Know I, he is not mine.
yet cant accept the reality
Divine, i would term the relation i have
yet i fear if it ends up well.
To accept the fact is what i try,
but in vein, and i merely fail.

All his love shared and possessed by her
and still i desire to have them
Deep in my heart, i envy her
her, who entered his life at first
yet i manage not to curse
for i know, i love him.

Down the pavement i walk as usual,
visualising him, holding my hand in his.
Hell did bless and i found him walking.
I found him walking not alone, but with her.
happily and hastily they walked,
hand in hand, chatting and laughing..

Emotionless i go the way forward.
My view scattered by my tears
yet hopeful in life i am and hopeful i remain.
He is not mine in this life,
nor can i have him in this life.
But in the next life, i will have him for my own.